Shhh… // Hamza Kazi

We cannot write silence. 

The beats

The pause

The breath

The way it aches

and persists 

and begs that, 

if only for a moment, 

our consciousness is only a whisper

our bodies, 

our lips,

the air that passes through falling chests 

and stillness

A melody of emotion. 

Sleeping in the quiet of a heartbeat skipped 

a word lost to the wind

The wickedness of reticence 

Encapsulated in air and time

The moment stretched too long

Hesitation perpetuated in the grip of fingernails

pressed into palms

We cannot write silence, 

but we can try

to find a way to immortalize emotion

to create space 

in the ceaseless drone of words that speak and spin

I cannot write silence. But I can write 

tears and years 

and the burn of long-stretched lies. 

I can write goodbyes and hellos 

And dozen ways to say

I love to hate you

Or 

I hate to love you

and sometimes 

I cannot tell the difference. 

Shhh SILENCE

The space I have upheld for myself. 

I cannot write silence. 

But I know it. 

and I have held it in my heart

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