Affliction, the last letter // Zarwa Nawaz
The one in blue!
It wasn’t just another spring evening of 2018, this evening held a lot of pain, torment, deprivation, blues and much more! She entered her attic, hustling things to find her dose of poison (her old journal), found it laying perfectly on a broken stool, blows air holding it tightly in her hands and coughs, “shit man!” The anti-allergy is out of stock how will I survive the night? sniffs dust, I am so doomed today.
Coughs again, opening it and reading out 20-6-14, while memories entangled back to her soul.
“Zarmeenay you are already late,” screamed Mrs. Khanzada as a girl of 5.6 in her early twenties; wearing a pink Anarkali with honey eyes and a not so chubby figure tried finding the right pair of dainty shoes from her closet.
“Coming Gul Jana. Just a sec and I’ll be out the door,” she flung her bag across her shoulder as she moved quickly to the main door she stumbled, covering her head properly with a light pink lightly embroidered chiffon dupatta. “Ahh! Finally, you are here, you are never up on time,” complained Mrs. Khanzada. “I am! Plus, the campus is only twenty minutes away from our place,” protested Zarmeenay. “But it takes an hour for me to reach my college,” leashed Mrs. Khanzada. As soon as they left the driveway, Zarmeenay’s phone beeped up; and the lecture has been canceled blinked the screen. “Shit!” eye rolls, “what? Like why? Ah! That means I am free till 11! Ya Rab! This is so unfair,” “And here you are,” exclaimed Mrs. Khanzada stopping the car at the main entrance that led to a worn-out building of her campus. “Do let me know when you get free,” she beamed. “Sure! I would, Gul Jana,” Zarmeenay left the car with a vague uncertain look bidding her goodbye.
She passed through the security barriers a gust of cold breeze went in and out her soul making her close her eyes, ah! Dust hugged her eyeballs, rubbing her eye bags she managed to open her eyes. Instead of moving ahead, she was glued to the ground she stood stoned examining the building right in front, she was aware of her fondness for old buildings but it was more than that, it was some sort of Deja-vu, the structure felt so familiar though it had been there since the day she got admitted to this institute. But today it reflected something else, a strong connection as she owned it like the building had a soul to which she was undoubtedly attracted towards and which seemed quite odd. I always have this love for old worn out buildings, don’t I? She asked herself rubbing off her thoughts and dragging herself to the main cafeteria that to her astonishment wasn’t crowded as usual. Drooping her stuff on the table she squealed hearing the same old gushy statement, “Mind if I join in?” asked Abdulrahman casually, pouncing on the chair right next to her.
“As if you would leave! If I don’t approve,” blurted Zarmeenay.
“I need your help; I couldn’t get even a bit of what we did yesterday. You know literature and I are no more in a relationship,” claimed Abdulrahman leaning back in his chair. “Yeah, Yeah and this happened right after your cheesy end with your recent love affair ‘that first sight right,” rolling eyes she said, “I doubt why do I have you as my class fellow?”
“Friend! You meant,” corrected Abdulrahman.
“Not to forget, Cursed for life,” Abdulrahman added.
“ I hate you, Mani okay!”
“Yeah, Okay! Okay!” Responded Abdulrahman.
“And your pathetic sense of humor. Enough of your chazzan let me get a cup of tea and get down to work you annoying brat.”
“Aww! You are such a mom Neena,” teased Mani.
“Mani, you are just so freaking impossible,” stabbed Zarmeenay leaving the table to get her tea. “Let’s get back to the business,” said Zarmeenay sipping the hot bubbling water and blotting down notes.
“Neena, You know what; I always regret your decision of opting literature. you are such a bright student, a decent delicate but at times the toughest one; you are wasting yourself! The system here doesn’t deserve you as a student.”
“Someone is being too sweet; I might end up having diabetes,” goofed Zarmeenay. “Well! Apparently, you know the whole story, don’t you? So, let’s not get into all this why I am here why I did so and study. Shall we?”
Mani nodded in approval.
Mani yawned, reading out a long paragraph from Oedipus Rex, “this is so boring,” he managed to complete his sentence.
Zarmeenay smiled, “yeah not one of those typical so-called love stories that you prefer,”
“Why do you get so sarcastic when it comes to love,” huffed Mani quite offended.
“Me? No, I never do! It’s just, never mind,” Zarmeenay said vaguely, dropping back to the notes scribbled right in front of her. The clock struck 9:45 as an uncertain aroma filled the air, chills ran through Zarmeenay as he entered the cafe! A long slender figure, fair enough to doubt the snow that the color it bore is fake enough, with eyes lowered as a gesture of innocence and purity, hair a mixture of grey and black. Dark circles hugging those pure eyes with the utmost intensity, nose pointed enough to show his ambitions, a perfectly clean shaved guy with that perfect collared blue shirt and those perfect pair of jeans that singled not easy to get. Made his way to the mid of the café.
She tried taking off her eyes from that perfectly charismatic personality, her cheeks shoot red with embarrassment she was never used to such behavior, and in fact, she wasn’t allowed to be one of those. Her heart pounced hard telling her that she had committed a sin and that’s what’s coming ahead the consequences are too drastic, but her eyes still lurked on to that slender figure.
She knew it had happened what was never meant to be a part of her dictionary, she fell for him the one in blue, unconsciously undoubtedly unwillingly she did. The damage was done, he dragged a chair opposite to their table, making her realize; that life from now on won’t be much easy as it was.
*To be continued*